BY BERNARD MUBIRU
Examination malpractice is one vice that has existed since time immemorial and it cuts across all education levels straight up to the Harvard like kind of institutions. In Kampala International University (Ishaka Campus) this is one vice that the administration has over the years tried to eradicate but seemingly failed solely because of evolution of newer cheating techniques. As the invigilators be formulating laws to curb a certain technique, legends be busy crafting 5 others which are not simply replacements but rather a perfection of the older one.
Below are some of the killer moves that are so far almost indestructible.
- The Giraffe Neck
This is simply self explanatory and it used to be a survival technique for many. Some lads used to be confident enough not to read for the exams knowing that their giraffe necks will bail them out. However the administration was wise enough and eradicated this technique with the “skip 2 seats ” kind of arrangement.
With the banishment of the giraffe technique, there was need for evolution to a better technique
2. The Eagle Eye
This one is for the visually fit lads. These guys have the capacity of eyeing content from a paper of a neighbour seated 4 meters adrift! Some people are naturally blessed by God! This move is killer though a few folks can’t handle it.
3. The Magical Palm
I branded this one magical simply because of the way it is employed. The guys employing this one really beat my understanding. They have the ability of summarizing an entire semester’s content on the palms and it’s really efficient because no one is gonna come asking you to turn your palms.
4. The Short Call
This one is a crafty one although it needs some kind of courage asking for a short call in every paper. One of my friends used to employ this one before I got to know his trick I used to think the dude had some renal ailment. How this guy used to do this was to simply leave his summary book in the chores, go answers the questions he knows then uses the short call excuse to go and perfect. This was a very efficient tactic and he was always among the best.
Finally, this last one really bewildered me
5. The Legendary
This is what we call taking stuff to a whole new level. There is this friend of mine in first year who used to carry a calculator in every paper and I used to wonder what was the guy calculating in an Ethics paper!Lucky enough one time I sat near him in an anatomy paper and at first I didn’t mind about blue light displayed by the calculator screen, perhaps it was a modern calculator I thought. It was until I saw a medulla oblongatta picture on the screen that I got to realize that indeed it wasn’t a calculator rather a phone! From that day on I highly respect the man.
However, cheating isn’t a cool thing, actually it’s a very risky game. Just prepare yourself in time for the exams and for Christ’s sake it not written anywhere that you should pass everything!
