Yes I might have poured my heart to you at 2 am in the morning, sue me. I like you, and Jameson being the perfect friend, it gave me that shove I needed to tell you. Okay this is somewhat a consolation because there’s nothing cute or unnerving about drunk texting, it’s the worst. The regretful feeling the next morning doesn’t help either, it doesn’t get any subtle.
Why is the forbidden fruit always the sweetest? I know, its human instinct to want what we can’t have. I do not know about you but alcohol heights are heavenly. The good kind I mean, where the words are a tad bit slurred but you are still in it enough to enjoy it.
We have all done it, right? Come on the “Heya” ” I’m soooooo drunk” ” I really miss you” must ring some bells. It’s extremely embarrassing, pathetic, hopeless but you got to blame it on the bottle. There’s like an imaginary permission slip for texting while drunk. “It’s not me, it’s my desperado.”
The moment is honestly joyous. Your mind being able to express itself in ways it otherwise wouldn’t, that’s thrilling.
The catch is knowing how to deal with the day after. After the head throbs, the tummy aches, the nausea have worked out of your system and you get your wits back, it hits you; you completely totaled yourself to the fuckboy that doesn’t give two shits about you. There’s no explanation for this behavior so don’t attempt to even try. Channel your inner Jim Carey from Dumb and dumber.
Under no circumstances should you apologize, nop. Doing this will mean you are still thinking of the douche sober. Simply act dump. Trust me, being the douche he is, he might not even respond to the texts… making you feel worse of course, but at least you aren’t explaining yourself.
If it has become a force of habit, have your phone locked up somewhere before you lose yourself to your better half, Tusker malt. Everyone has that friend that hangs out at the bar but sips on sodas the entire night. That’s your life saver. Avoid it if you can.
Then again, what’s the fun in getting high and doing nothing with your heights? See it this way, your drunk texting is for you. The sober miserable you that’s always obsessing about something they never would do. It’s embarrassing yes but in the moment when you’re texting, you’re at an all-time high. Who cares who’s on the receiving end of this text, as long as it makes you happy, then do it. Deal with the self-loath another day.
