Dear Big sis,
I have dated this guy since my first year, second semester. I am now in my third year. We have been having protected sex throughout our relationship but recently, we really got so drunk. We got caught up in the moment and had unprotected sex. Two weeks later,I realise I am pregnant for him. I tell him, only to be shoved with the “you know what Priscilla, I have been wanting to tell you this for a while, but I am married,” bullshit! I could not believe that I have been dating a married nigga. And the worst thing is, he is not ready to dump his wife for me. Now I realise that I was just being used. I am broken, I do not know what to do. I feel I should keep my baby but I am not sure whether I will manage to take care of him/her…. one thing is for certain though, my parents will be disappointed with me! So the other side of me says I should abortion. Please help.
-Priscilla from Nkumba University.
Phillis Nakintu- Counselor at Kyambogo University replies;
Priscilla, the move you two chose to have protected sex for the past two years or so was a good move. Having unprotected sex was such a big risk, however, you should know everything happens for a reason. What you should do here is call him, ask him to meet and sort issues out. Let him make it clear if he will take responsibility of the pregnancy or not. Of course you cannot force him to marry you, even if you are comfortable with being his second wife (which in your e-mail, you clearly isn’t comfortable with), let him decide for himself. If he loves you, he will take responsibility of the pregnancy.
Thinking of abortion is not really a good idea. There are serious complications that may result from abortion…you risk dying and also, you may never bare children again. Call him up and talk. If he is ready to take responsibility, agree on how well he will take care of you and the baby. All the best!
