By Agatha Muhaise
Twitter: @Agie256M
Just when you think you have gotten a grip of how these Christians carry themselves, they shock you with a sex tape. As if that is not mouth dropping enough, the center of excellence is then invaded by cheating lying guild officials. To save you more of these astound in the future, lets have a glimpse of what happens at UCU.
It is only at UCU where you find two dress code policies that work concurrently by day and by night. The girls in this university will dress up like mother Teresa by day, sweeping the ground with their devastatingly long dresses. But what you will see by night…uhm! Let’s just say playboy mansion models are decent dressers compared to it. One would think its cold by day and ‘extremely’ hot by night in Mukono.
You will hardly find any other place where girls carry huge bags to club, to be more specific, freshers. Considering the dress code policy, these girls have to keep up appearances. So they carry a bag with all the necessary accessories and crowd the bar with their luggage looking like long distance migrants. Casablanca 2 and Hive should put a bag room to cater for its devoted customers.
The Guild Government of UCU causes more scandals than the entire student body. Okay, I know you hate math so let’s keep it simple, the guild government is approximately 5% of the whole students’ body. You will be surprised how loud the minority group can be. I am inclined to think part of the new agenda of these guys is to cause at least one scandal per week….way to go officials, you are famous now!!
It is only at UCU where a strike is unheard of. When Kyambogo made a strike then MUBs followed in line, we thought maybe UCU students would finally act like normal campusers and do ‘something’. Well all that ended in our imagination, these guys can never be caught stepping out of line. MUK should borrow a student’s code of conduct from them; apparently theirs is not matching the energy of this generation.
It is only at UCU where people get drunk before getting to the bar. We are still evaluating if it is the effect of high prices of drinks at the bar (which are not so high by the way), that they decided to drink from hostel. Or the bars just do not have their brands of drinks that they have to find them outside. But these guys enter the bar with heights already staggering. What is the point of going to the bar again if you are already on cloud nine??
It is only at UCU where you will find a person holding one bottle of beer from 9pm to 5 am. I honestly don’t know how they do it but it never gets over. I am guessing at some point it looses taste. The most interesting part is when they start faking heights in the middle of the night, not to look out of place. Finish that drink already and go home, you are crowding the place for nothing.
While we are still on the issue of drinking, it is only at UCU where you will find a drink up with sodas, juice and tea as the drinks. Before you get judgmental first consider the fact that this is a CHRISTIAN university. They are just trying to match the energy of other universities using other resources. Uhm.
It is only at UCU where students truly like hanging out on the campus compound. We get it, the compound is large and clean it gives an impression of gardens. But it does not mean you should picnic there the whole weekend. Princess Gardens is loosing market, you are not in boarding school, and you are actually allowed to get out of the gate.
And it is only at UCU where mass communicators do law. These guys have a course unit on media law and a few law terms are coined in the lecture room. They cram three articles in the constitution and like five sections in the penal code and they are good to go. By the time they are done, these comrades feel like they can offer legal advise on anything be it theft, land, even murder. They are true patrons of the description, ‘jacks of all fields but masters of none’.
