Janet Museveni: I forgive Stella Nyanzi

Education minister and First Lady, Janet Kataaha Museveni on Wednesday night said that she “forgives Stella Nyanzi”.

This follows a scarthing Facebook post by the Makerere research labeling the First Lady as “brainless”.

While speaking to NTV, the Education Minister said that she doesn’t understand where all the anger and hatred by research fellow, Nyanzi originates from.

“To critics who say I am out of touch with reality; I have been to Karamoja and Ruhama and in touch with our people,” the First Lady said.

Below is the Facebook post Dr Stella Nyanzi penned on Wednesday afternoon.

Makerere University researcher, Dr Stella Nyanzi is at it again. After a scathing Facebook post attack that landed her in deep trouble, she has yet again penned another missive directed at First Lady and Education Minister, Janet Kataaha Museveni. This one is a bomshell! Read it below;

“She opened her lying mouth and said, “Walk your children to school,
I walked four kilometers to and from school when I was a child!”
The lazy pig that flew her children in aeroplanes to school looked down her long piggy nose and told us to walk our children to school.
Do as I say, not as I do, she says through her lying teeth.

She opened her rotten jaws and said, “Do not pile your children on bodaboda motorbikes, but instead buy a car to take them to school!”
The big-thighed cow that is driven all over our country in a convoy of motorcades rubbed her thighs and told us to buy cars or else walk.
Do as I say, not as I do, she says upon her cellulite-covered thighs.

She opened her venomous mandibles and said, “Do not abandon your children to dangerous bodabodamen, but walk them to school!”
The poisonous snake is wife to a tyrant who abandoned Uganda’s poor citizenry, in preference to thickening the bellies of a few kin.
Do as I say, not as my husband does, she hisses venomously.

She opened her empty brains and said, “Schools must now open at 08:00AM and close 05:00PM, as well as close over weekends!”
The empty-brained leopardess has sat silently for thirty-one years as a whole generation of Ugandans started school at six or seven and ended school at six or seven, sometimes even having night-time preps in boarding schools… she said nadda for thirty-one long years, and now she is nyonyonyoing about school hours! Somebody lend this woman quarter a brain, or some piece of brain. Just, just, just lend her a few brain cells… for she is a certified – approved fool!

She opened her long blood-sucking proboscis and dared to tell us that bodabodas are dangerous transport for our children. Huh! We are the bodaboda-generation. Our fathers, husbands, brothers, sons, uncles and nephews grew rich on the Mwaanyi-Zaabala motorbikes that first ferried coffee during the magendo days. Our men reclaimed their manhood through providing for us when they transported contraband goods and criminal merchants on their Bajjaj bodabodas riding through illicit dust-covered routes criss-crossing the country from every inconspicuous border-point. Our boy friends and casual lovers rode bodabodas or hired bodabodas to stealthily come visit us in the wee hours of the night. As women and girls, we have grown up mounting all sorts of bodabodas, spreading out legs wide on top of them, sitting astraddle them, holding tight the waists of bodabodamen and flying up and down the streets, paths and highways of Uganda atop these motorbike. Helmet or not, seat-belt or not, driver’s license or not, third party or not, accidents or not, we know, we trust and we love our bodabodas and bodabodamen. Our children can sleep safely while riding on the back of bodabodas.

Somebody, please get the first lady a bodabodaman to ride her up and down Rwakitura or Kololo or Entebbe or Nakasero. Somebody tell the Minister of Education that these bodabodamen she disparages are our fathers, husbands, brothers, sons, nephews and uncles – yes even our boy friends, lovers and casual sex partners for a fee! Our children are a lot safer under the care of bodabodamen than they are under the nepotistic family rule entrenched by the Musevenis. How can bodabodamen be more dangerous than a rogue regime whose president appoints his wife as Minister of Education, and wants his son to be future president? Who is more dangerous than the Musevenis today? Somebody teach Janet Kataaha Museveni how to mount a motorbike, spread her thighs wide and sit atop the beastly machine, put her cotton knickers on the bodaboda’s seat made of fake leather, hold tight the bodabodaman’s sweaty waist and ride all over Uganda as ordinary Ugandans do. We need to educate the Minister of Education. We must renew her brain based on everyday experiences. Aluta continua…”