“I got my 2 f-ck buddies from cell, we are in the same cell and none of them knows that I sleep with the other, perhaps, I am eyeing some new cell girl too…” says Jordan, Psychology Student at MUK.
This year has been a surprising one, from lesbians, to f-ckboys all over campus and now sex in cells. You might think that these fellas that frequent church, confess their sins and profess their love for Christ can actually forego the seed of sin (sex), think again.
Cell is a small regular gathering made up of Christians centered on spiritual improvement and also based on Christian values for the growth of church members, most cells in and around Universities are made up of 10-15 Christians.
Truth be told, some sharp guys just go to church on Sunday, not because they are lovers of the most high but because the so called ‘church girls’ are some of the most pretty girls around town and also because these are some of the most vulnerable girls. Now, most churches organize cell that can be attended in groups on different days but not the Sabbath and these cells are only headed by a cell leader, not a pastor.
“I am a cell regular but unlike the rest, I don’t go there for the girls, I go there for me, for my spiritual enrichment, for my family, for my future, for success, and for the sake of my faith in the most high. Although, many people have joined cell in the past 2 weeks and after a while they don’t come back and the girls also leave, something wrong must be happening.”-Amos, Business Computing at MUBS
The guys now know that she might just fall for you not because you have abs or a muscular body, but because you are a cell regular and like a wolf in a sheep’s cloth, they take the lead, be the first and even go ahead to organize cell yet they are hyenas eyeing fresh prey.
“I personally go to cell because the girls are just what are I need to wake up early the next morning with, they are free, down to earth and can easily be swayed by just a little politeness and off-head Bible verses…” reveals Andrew, BBA Makerere.
“My boys and I just go to cell because these girls often come skimpily dressed in their nighties and some nights are pretty cold, we do them a favor, we keep them warm under our own sheets…” Julius, Law Student at Uganda Christian University shares.
Do not be fooled by the church going tendencies, not even the frequent cell nights should fool you, they do it as a case of keeping up appearances, and the hyenas around campus just sniffed that out, what next for the cell goers?