We wake up to a fresh sex scandal on our social media waves in Uganda. What is unique about these scandals however is that most of them either culminate from popular networking site Twitter or they are exposed there. From self-professed bitter and angry feminists to young and naïve campus students, the sexual network has spilled to the old and mature senior citizens of this banana republic.
Today, we unveil some of the most popular sexual spills that have hit the networking site in the last one year.
1. The Surviving Series
Nothing may beat this sexual scandal in the coming years, our sexperts have said. This scandal had one girl at the centre and our sources reveal that she swallowed members from both the “old twitter” and the youngins in “new twitter” since the two categories decided to distinguish themselves. Her sexual network was so huge that she would at times simultaneously dupe six different guys about having their baby and they would all accept – which only means that chances are high that she would not stop at just eating them but would eat them live.
“Her level of networking was so calculated and discrete that she would at times engage with two best friends and they would never at one point disclose their engagement with her to each other. If you ask me, that is some really coded sexual network”, Daniel, one of our sexperts disclosed.
2. Finessing Money for Business and 47K
Could we move on without rating this one, absolutely not. This scandal was brought to light by one of the most followed Ugandans outside the known celebrity circles. To show how serious it was, almost as soon as he hinted on it, his account was suspended by Twitter and even after he got it back, the damage had been done and the tea was already served. The scandal involved a little known student of Uganda Christian University (UCU) that the Tweep alleged had been giving out her cookie for just 47K.
Even as much as he didn’t delve in details, the Ugandans on Twitter had already deciphered the circumstances and concluded that the allegation was true since it was coming from a genuine source. The other allegation that came to light about her was that she had finessed someone’s father of a large sum of money to start a business, but it was concluded to be untrue.
3. Airpods and Sex in Campusers
There is a certain campuser that made airpods an issue of discussion for close to two months before a sex scandal revolving around the same airpods rocked Twitter. It was discovered that the campuser was using iPhones and airpods to vibe and consequently eat unsuspecting but willing girls that he would get off the app.
The epitome of the scandal was when his alleged girlfriend created multiple fake accounts to expose his sex secrets and the timeline ended up discovering nasty details about his shabby room and his uncircumcised “member.”
4. Horny Threads About Sex Escapades
If you are new to Twitter, you may not know what a thread is but it is a kind of story that captures a long piece in resulting tweets that are interlinked because the tweet limit cannot cover all characters (words) in one tweet.
A girl from Makerere University’s Mary Stuart Hall revealed shocking details of how she was eaten by a guy from one of those rooms in their hall that house more than three roommates. In the story that made rounds on the app, she professed undying love for the meat and actually confessed to having had enjoyed every bit of her public eating that resulted in all roommates knowing what had happened.
5. Dating a Feminist Gone Bad
The most recent sex scandal to hit the twitter waves was the one where a guy regretted having dated a feminist and the whole thing backfired on him. The guy, who is a big wig in the Tourism industry dated a feminist and their relationship went sore – something he thought would be wise to blame on her. The self-professed “angry feminist” reacted by exposing uglier details of their relationship that captured only one good thing about him, being a good cook.
All these go far to show you that there is really a huge sexual network on Ugandan social media that would require proper unearthing to be properly exposed.
