Are you that guy that seem to be stuck in the “friendzone” with a girl you really like? It can be very upsetting if this is the case, as nothing hurts more than watching the one you love with someone else.
Most times, guys who are stuck in this kind of situation would rather stay friends with the girl as they find it difficult to be without her. But all hope is not lost, just because a girl sees you as just a friend does not mean there are no ways to get her to want more from you.
See what you can do..
1. Be There For Her: It is easy to get offended when someone you like seem not to be interested in you that way, especially if she is also dating someone else. Do not give in to the urge to be bitter or mean. Be there for her. Show her you are a true friend, listen to her and let her know you care about her unconditionally. This way, she would see you as not just a friend, but also a confidant. This is one step towards her being unable to imagine life without you.
2. Let Her Realize What She Is Missing: Whether we like it or not, human beings are shallow by nature. Work on yourself to make you irresistible to her. Pay attention to what you wear, your perfume, how you look, etc. Your affection for her can make her heart flutter when you walk into a room and gradually she starts to admit to herself that you are quite good looking.
3. Hang Out With Her: One thing you have going for you that other guys don’t is that you are friends.
So, coming up with opportunities for you both to hang-out should not be too difficult. Visit her in the hostel, her class after lectures… You could ‘flex’ with a group of other friends or one-on-one. The point is that, you should be the most important person in her social life. If you are going to hang out with her one-on-one though, avoid extremely romantic settings since this could make her suspicious that you are trying to manipulate her.
4. Share: Be it stories, secrets ormemories, sharing with someone creates a bond like no other. This is usually why you would see best friends who have maintained their friendship for decades. Try as much as possible to let her into your life and also encourage her to open up more about herself. Once you can get her to talk to you like she talks to no other, then you have all you need.
5. Make Her Think About You: There are many ways to make sure you are on someone’s mind. You could send her fun text messages from time to time, get her little gifts or surprise her when you can. The point is that she should find it difficult to go a whole day without you popping into her mind from time to time.
6. Make Her Miss You: After you have succeeded in doing all the above, the next step is to give her some time off from you. Before doing this though, be sure that you have made the right impressions on her. Take some days or week off from being with her. Let her be the one to wonder what is going on. When you notice she starts to contact you often and expresses that she is missing your company, then you know you are close.
7. Express Your Feelings: When you are sure that she is starting to feel you, even just a little bit, this is when you go all-in and lay it all out there. Let her know that you have feelings for her and would like to begin a relationship. Avoid being too intense when you say this (like declaring undying love or proposing marriage). Give her time to get used to the idea but let her also know it is also okay if she is not comfortable with this. If you do things this way, she would not feel so pressured that she puts up a ‘wall’.
8. Be Patient: These steps above are not ones to rush through. Getting someone who previously does not see you as boyfriend material to consider a relationship with you could take time. Do not despair if things are not moving on as fast as you would like. Remember, it would be so much worth it when you finally have her in your arms.
Essentially to note, many guys on campus have been in close platonic friendship with the opposite sex, however they have not had the courage to express what they feel to the partner.
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