BY BERNARD MUBIRU
Well if there’s one thing I’ve learnt from experience is never to judge someone by their appearance. And if there’s one group of people who fake appearances, it’s campus slay queens. It’s not like all of them do so of course, there are some authentic ones but majority of them just put up a show to convince these poor boys that they are way out of their league. The truth however, is that they also ‘cane’ the same hustles all boys go through just because they do it smartly and differently.
Fast Foods
A slay queen can convince you that she can’t have food from cheap restaurants and many dudes fall into this trap and end up emptying their pockets just to fund the occasion. But in actual sense, these girls are the biggest fans of the umbrella (chapati stalls) though they do it in a wise manner by simply altering their feeding schedules. They always make sure they approach these joints at around 10 pm or when it is raining because they know few people will see them and in case they find customers, they order last and also have their own unique phrases that can confuse you.
A slay queen can never order for a Kikomando, she will order for 2 sliced chapatis and bean gravy. The Rolex, they call that an omelette in a chapati . “At first I thought my Musoga chapati guy had introduced a new menu so I patiently waited on the sides only to be shocked to see that sliced chapati and bean gravy was the real kikomando of 1k!” Ashaba, one of victims narrated.
Transport Issues
No slay queen can admit that she doesn’t have money to transport her back home. Whenever you meet her on the way she’s always the first to inform you how she has discovered that she’s added a few kilograms on her weight so she has started exercising in order to burn the excess fat however skinny she may be. But surprisingly when you offer a lift or transport to her, she cannot refuse it!
Diet
This is a great ‘brokeness’ defensive mechanism to these girls. When you find her in a market shopping cassava and small fish (Mukene) of 1k she starts narrating how she has been advised by parents against daily consumption of chips and chicken as it poses health complications, but dare tempt to take her out that very evening, she all over a sudden forget about the cholesterol imposed threats.
From the above information, we are advising campus gents to always be alert when you’re relating with these girls. Don’t hide your tricks just discuss them together with her since she may be knowing them better than you and at the end you are helped out!