I was freshly single after a 4-year relationship ( from my high school till 2nd year). I was in my 3rd year at Muk and I had officially, and excitedly, decided I wasn’t going to fall in love until I graduate, get a job and build my career. I was the self-proclaimed President of the Men Are Trash society (yes the anger was real). I had written off any sort of emotional ties to another human being. I was just ready to f**k, dance, and flee. In short, these things happened, but not in the way that I expected them to.
When I broke things off with my ex, I got a taxi back to campus from Mukono (he was at UCU) sobbing and thinking about how much of a fool I had made myself thinking I would even marry this guy. As soon I got to Wandegeya i headed to the lecture room because we had a class assignment to complete and hand in and being the group leader, well, I had to be present even though my heart had just been stabbed hours ago. Extreme back of the room with a smooth voice and extremely gorgeous-looking facial hair: my soon-to-be-friend-with-very-wonderful-benefits was already diligently working on our assignment with a few other group members. To save some time and silly details, we eventually started hooking up. His honesty, almost immediately, let me know that he wasn’t looking for anything serious and that he was happy being just friends with benefits. He told me this in person, which was rather new to me but again made me feel like it is an important point to take into consideration for the generation of technology, and the kids infamous for wasting time and resources yet the only thing they want is to hit it. Anyway, it wasn’t long before we realized we were a perfect match sexually. But he was hyper, high-strung, and into exploring everyone’s bodies. We weren’t a match made in heaven, nor did we want to be. It was the ideal situation. Come over, give leg, cuddle, say your goodbyes and to let the other be.
Unlike traditional relationships, we left the “get to know each other” bullshit aside and bantered, f***d, and empowered one another. I didn’t care what he thought of me. I wasn’t dressing up any certain way. We flirted with other people at parties and in clubs. He talked about his bu other babes. I cried about my ex-boyfriend in front of him. Over and over, we became closer and closer without even fully grasping or realizing the extent of it all. We also openly discussed love, a taboo topic for friends with benefits. I had only been in love once, for the first time, and it was more incredible than I could ever imagine. I didn’t know or want to know, what the second time would be like. We would discuss this sometimes throughout our time together. He would roll over in bed and say, “Are you falling in love with me?” to which I would laugh and reply, “Hell no.” At the time I believed it. However, it seemed that the more we brought it up, the more focus we had on the emotion. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, I was thinking about feelings. I was contemplating the things he said, how he said them, and when. The casual fuck buddy pact was unravelling at a rapid pace and I was terrified that it was going to be one-sided.
He asked me to move into his apartment with him. He told that he wanted me to be his live-in f**k buddy. Yes, hilariously, we thought this was a legit and normal thing. We were so into our friendship that we truly believed that we could live under the same roof and not start a serious relationship. We had some serious connections concerning our course at campus and of course sex. We fit well together in those two respects and at the time we didn’t see or didn’t choose to see, how well we fit together everywhere else. Yes, we were morons but give me a break, we were only 22. Coping with insecurities and jealousy was another hurdle that I wasn’t prepared for with my now retired f**k buddy. He had become something deeper overnight even though he had always been there. We were falling in love with each other. As it was happening, we thought we were only becoming close friends but now we realize that it contributed to the strong and desirable love that we currently celebrate. I unearthed a sexual soulmate and turned him into the best man I could ever wish for.
