Open Letter To My Fresher Sister: F*ckboys Are Real

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It’s a Friday evening and my cousin sister is texting me about the reporting FOMO. Of course, like any excited fresher, she is very optimistic about joining MUBS. No, I’m not interested in her reporting hullaballoo but rather in how she’s to cope up with the new campus environment, which is fun filled and very challenging at the same time.

The chat quickly escalates to which hostel she’s going to reside whilst at MUBS. Being a budding queen slayer from one of these “big schools” around town. I suggest she maybe goes to Akamwesi but she declines. “I prefer New Ideal”, clearly, she’s made research-and perhaps booked already. Being someone who’s passed through MUBS, I have  a million reasons to worry about the girl child who’s soon enroling such a “tempting” surrounding.

Th chat prompts me to write an open letter to fresher girls out there to beware of the university syndrome known as “Young kings” or ‘F*ckboys’.

Dear sister, let the term above not confuse you, young kings have been commonly known as f*uckboys but their actions backlashed over recent years and hence the “rebrand”. To start with, they’re not labeled or any different from other students. However, there are several attributes to these so called young kings. They have the latest iPhone, perhaps a 7+, a Rolex (not the edible one), a car and likely to have customized T-shirts with their Instagram handle or struggling boutique in town.

They’re nice when they want to rip you off! Sister, don’t be deceived by the thousands of likes and stories you see on their Instagram, Snapchat name it. They’re presumably rich and have those “shoulder” friends who have to spread the might. But guess what, this is just a high upkeep payout by the parents. So, he can ably take you to KFC or order Jumia Food straight to your room. What’s there to lose? Nothing to him.

He’ll over the weekend pick you up from your double room, take you out and finally pass by his place with his car but remember he does that for other girls too. Young kings have impressive rooms, the latest home theater system, that 50+ inch screen and perhaps a laptop to keep you busy.

Now that you’ve gained independence, bar hopping is likely to take you up. From MUBS, to Club Play but the snap stories say it’s lit at Pana and Valhalla has cheap beer. A jaj would would cost you like 35k, but the young king has a car for turn up so you’re tempted to “save costs”. The fact is young kings can NEVER buy you anything likely to stay in your possession to pin him after he’s used you. Say a dress, clutch or phone.

And they never take pics with you. So after turn up at around 3am, he’ll drive you and claim there’s kawunyemu that side of your hostel or any other bogus excuse and this shall compel you to, of course, sleep at his hostel. You’re nursing a height, emotionally excited for everything he’s done for you that night forgetting the devil is mining deeper than Uganda is for its oil.

The night will have passed, he’s used you and shame is doing its routine, haunting you. Remember you’re at his mercy to film or not film whatever happened.

Lastly, sister, and whoever is reading this, should such a thing happen to you, don’t lose yourself but rather get composed, brush off the shame and do what your parents brought you to MUBS (or elsewhere) to do. Prevention is better than cure they said. Avoid young kings.

Yours sincerely,

Elder brother.

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